Good Friday that Was't So Good!

My brothers (I have two), my sister-in-laws (two of them also), my nieces (two of them) and my nephew (only one of them but one on the way) all came over on Friday. It was beautiful outside so we planned on having lunch and the kids would get to play and have an egg hunt. The morning was great. We slept in, woke up and didn't have to rush to be anywhere...awesome!

Then Jada's anxiety kicked it. She pulled a chair to the front door and opened the blinds and sat their waiting for her cousins. Most parents would think that was cute but not me....not when I know that she can't help it. Lunch was ready but she refused to eat until they got here. She was worried. So worried in fact that she asked me if I thought they forgot how to get here. Nothing I tried could get her away from that door. Thirty minutes later, they got here and she finally stepped away from the door.

She then had hours of fun. Things were going so well that my sister in law and I ran out to get icing for brownies and to the book store. Traffic was rough causing us to be a little longer than expected. I got a call from my mom that things had changed. Jada was raging and I wasn't here to diffuse the situation. I don't know what set her off but I do know that the rest of the afternoon was rough.

When I got home, I could see the difference in her. I left her as a care free little girl enjoying a day outside with her cousins and come home to a child who was aggravated and aggressive. She wasn't in a rage at that moment but it didn't take long for another one to strike.

The next one lasted for about half and hour, maybe more. I don't know what set that one off either. Someone could have looked at her. She may have wanted to play a certain way but the other's didn't want to. The wind may have blown her hair. It could have been anything. All I remember is that it came. I lost the rest of the day. It was rough and I was exhausted. I did have a nice visit with the family before and between the rages.

During her rages, I tell her to go to her room until she calms down. If she isn't in full blown attack, sometimes she will go. Most of the time, though, I escort her. And she will then walk out right behind me. I say nothing to her and bring her back and we keep at this for as long as it takes for her to get that she has to stay in her room until she is calm. There are a few occasions when she is exhausted from what her body and mind just went through that she will fall asleep. And I let her rest. Other times, I leave her there until I forget that I sent her and remember again when it registers that it is too quiet around.

We have had years of this. Things were better a few months ago, but just like insulin needs change, so do medicine needs. Although I never know what is going on in her mind, I know now what we are dealing with. There is no more yelling or spanking. Just going with it and being consistent. Take the rages as they come. Protect Jada from hurting herself. Protect Erin from being hurt. Protect me as much as I can, but if someone has to have the physical pain that comes along with a rage, I prefer it to be me.

When she rages, she can hit, bite, or throw anything she can get her hands on. I try my hardest to protect anyone around during these times and usually it is just my mom, Erin, and me.